Wednesday, November 30, 2011

I'm thinking sterilization...

Mrs. Rock: "I don't want to start any new medications. I've been taking Clomid, and am trying to become pregnant."

Dr. Grumpy: "Okay."

Mrs. Rock: "I've been on it for 2 months now, and it still hasn't worked."

Dr. Grumpy: "Has your husband been checked out?"

Mrs. Rock: "Oh, he's overseas for the year."

Dr. Grumpy: "Then, um, why are you taking Clomid?"

Mrs. Rock: "So I can get pregnant. That's what Clomid does. This way I can get pregnant without a guy."

45 comments:

ER's Mom said...

Criminy, what a dumb doc not to ask about male factors...

River said...

They just get dumber and dumber...

Amanda said...

I always reply to your posts in my head with "Shut the hell up"

Li'l Azathoth said...

"Like in that movie where the woman got pregnant from the midichlorians. That's what Clomid is, right?"

Haven said...

This is going to be a very unpleasant revelation for a lot of christians.

Margaret/Heather said...

...now *that's* what I call advances in pharmacology.

Anonymous said...

I hope her future kids aren't as stupid as she clearly is. ~Francine

Anonymous said...

My first thought was that she was cheating on her soldier-hubby...

I'm not sure which option I like best for the sake of humanity.

Mal said...

So did you explain the birds and the bees to her, or are you going to leave that to her fertility specialist?

Grumpy, M.D. said...

I'm just a simple neurologist, ma'am.

Anonymous said...

"But why are you asking me all these medical questions anyway? You're a neurologist; aren't you just supposed to fix my car?"

Anonymous said...

maybe she's trying to do "self insemination"?

Outre said...

I have no words, in fact some of my neurons have self-destructed from the stupid.

On the other hand, I guess the Virgin Mary was taking Clomid.

Neuroscience PhD said...

I don't think humans have worked out parthenogenesis yet. Lucky for us.

SuFu PhD said...

Please don't explain anything to her. Just let it ride and pray that she doesn't further the genetic degradation of the human race.

Lizard said...

I want to make her stop (though having taken clomid, which is horrible, it's kind of hilarious that she's going through it for nothing) but what I really want to do is find the doc who prescribed it for her and at minimum mock them mercilessly

Packer said...

I just joined ranks with her, because I just can't figure this out. Oh, and my speach is slurred and my left leg is dragging. WOW !!

Solitary Diner said...

Ignorance of reproduction is a sort of self-sterilization. Go Darwin.

Anonymous said...

And this is why sex ed is so important in school. Nobody should be this ignorant about their own body and how it works.

Anonymous said...

Hail Mary!

K-Koira said...

At least this means we will probably never have to be subject to children from this woman...

bobbie said...

Anyone that stupid SHOULDN'T be allowed to reproduce!

OldSquid said...

My favorite retort:

Mrs.Rock, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.

A Doc 2 Be said...

Too bad evolution is not reversible or the "encouragement" of Darwin's theory not legal.

Wowser!

C said...

I just laughed out loud in clinic. Did you disavow her of that notion or is she still hoping for an immaculate conception?

dr lasermed said...

rock, as in "dumb as"?

Unfortunately, we see this in GYN a lot. No understanding of cycles, fertility, etc. "I haven't had sex since...." But the baby is 2 months less than that.

Love your names for patients. I try to immitate, but still don't have the nack.

Tee said...

Oh dear. Dr. Grumpy, how do you manage to keep a straight face when talking to these people?

Anonymous said...

Old Squid, thanks for the laugh! Iove that movie!

Anonymous said...

The bad news: You can't cure stupid.
The good news: You can't clone it either.

And I guess she's also blissfully unaware of the fact that she is presently at risk of getting "Clomidia"?

MedWriter said...

As someone who's done one fresh cycle and one frozen cycle of IVF (resulting each in 1 kid, yay!) this really tickles my funny bone. Maybe Dr. Grumpy can fix that :)

Anonymous said...

I'm a new fan- and pray tell Dr. Grumpy, is this the STUPIDEST thing a patient has ever told you or where does it fit into your top ten?

Grumpy, M.D. said...

I gave up keep tracking years ago.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if she ordered it online. I pity the hubby who comes home to quadruplets after she has a fling.

Sue Denyhm said...

I guess The Church has been keeping this secret from us for some 2000+ years.

FrankC said...

Maybe hubby writes very passionate letters?

minimedic said...

Please tell us you made this up...for the sake of humanity, PLEASE lie to us and say that this level of stupidity does not exisit!

Mockingbird said...

Mrs, Rock, you must use the turkey baster with the Clomid, you can't just take it orally.

Anonymous said...

what a waste of opposable thumbs...

Technically Insane said...

Please tell me she knew we hadnt advance that far in science!

clairesmum said...

Mrs. Rock as in John Rock, one of the inventors of "the Pill"?
Clomid is nasty stuff - chronic PMS and THEN you get your period - and in her case it may really have damaged her brain permanently!
darwinism in action, i guess.

Anonymous said...

ROFLOL @ Mockingbird.

OB student said...

That is some powerful drug. She'd better be careful not to take it after she gets pregnant. Then her fetus may get pregnant as well. Schei├če this could become an infinite loop of pregnancies inside one uterus.

The Quirked Eyebrow said...

Be afraid ~ she wants to breed. :P

Vicki said...

I can believe this. I had a roommate whose husband was still in Taiwan, and she kept getting upset because she wasn't getting pregnant!

Anonymous said...

OMFG...I'm not much of an environmenalist, but c'mon...there's gotta be some kind of contamination out there producing these mutations. I am convinced we could not have survived through the centuries with this level of ignorance and stupidity that exists today. I'm not sure some of these people wouldn't become confused and run toward, not away from a rabid animal.

I had a patient the other day come in complaining that her medication tasted disgusting and made her mouth feel "all greasy". It was a suppository.

 
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