Monday, October 12, 2009

Dear Smuckers,

The bozo in your "Sundae Syrup" division who developed your "No Mess Cap" bottle has obviously not met my kids.

This is false advertising, and I'm sending you the bill for having to repaint my kitchen.

Yours truly,

Ibee Grumpy, M.D.

11 comments:

Hospital CPhT said...

No mess cap? HA! There is no such thing. With enough effort, the no mess cap can make a glorious mess that would make any housekeeper cry.

Fiz said...

So what did Marie do this time? Or the boys. Or the dogs! More information is needed, please!

P.S Migranat is my sign-in - a new form of migraine treatment?!

Grumpy, M.D. said...

Frank. He just somehow covered everything in sight.

Vegan Epicurean said...

Sounds like someone is a budding Jackson Pollock.

Anonymous said...

Ah, it takes talent! Perhaps he is a budding artist??? The next Jackson Pollock???

Celeste said...

We just got a new bottle of Heinz ketchup that has some funky gasket to keep down the spray. You have to squeeze like crazy so it's harder for my girl to do on her own now, and there are still drips on the cap that have to be cleaned off. boo hiss

Helen said...

I once babysat for two kids whose mother thought they would enjoy making candles. I melted her enormous vat of red wax on the stove, then poured it into the foil tray she had left for us, oblivious to the fact that one of the kids had earlier attempted to turn it into a hat and had cut through the middle of it, then given up and put it back.

It broke, of course, and wax went absolutely everywhere - it covered the entire stove surface and dripped down into the burners and onto the floor, where it instantly hardened. I spent the rest of the day chipping it off with a butter knife.

Anonymous said...

So, got pics?

Grumpy, M.D. said...

No, I was too busy frantically cleaning before Mrs. Grumpy got back from her meeting. She'd kill me.

Anonymous said...

I love no mess caps, they are great!! normal bottles if you squeeze them it just slurps of the end, but with no mess ones you have to really squeeze until the pressure overcomes that little valve and it shoots out in a jet at high speed.

Lisa said...

They are as bad as the child proof packages that you gotta pay a neighborhood toddler to open as it is impossible to do if you are an adult.

 
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